LEARN TO DRAW THE LINES IN YOUR LIFE YOURSELF!
Life’s experiences teach you a lot. Some of them are bitter, some happy, but what is most important is that you learn from those experiences. These experiences may be like stumbling blocks in your life but we have to learn to make convert them into stepping stones to success. I have always advocated the habit of “Introspective Re-Awakening” and though; at times it may seem a bit hard or even harsh on you, trust me the end result is worth the pain. As they say there is always a bright light at the end of a dark tunnel!
Here are a few tips on how I went through those tough phases and learned to take them in my stride and convert them into positive outcomes. I will not specifically relate any incident but rather focus on giving you the positive tips to approach any such situation or even avoid it and get a positive outcome out of that situation. I hope my thoughts will help you define your goals in life, and achieve them.
What do you mean by "Drawing the line in Life" and how do you achieve it to bring about a change in your life, substantially if not totally?
My aforementioned adage “When writing the story of your life…don’t let someone else hold the pen” in itself is the very base of your success. In fact I am happy to inform that I will be shortly publishing my 15th Book (Yet to be finally named) which is based on the essence / meaning of those very lines. Knowingly or unknowingly we are so overwhelmed and influenced by “What others say” or “What will others say?” that we inadvertently tend to lose our own identity and act or follow the script written by others in our own personal life.
"Drawing the line" in life means establishing clear boundaries and making conscious decisions about what you will and will not accept, prioritize, or allow. It's about taking control of your time, energy, and focus by defining your values and acting in alignment with them.
Let us review and understand those key steps we should take, and apply to our lives to get a positive outcome:
Setting Boundaries:
Drawing a line involves identifying your limits and communicating them to others. This could be in your personal relationships, work life, or any other area where you need to protect your well-being and focus. You define your boundaries, and limits in your life, your career, your work and ensure that they are rational, achievable and not unrealistic! This will save you a lot of stress and disappointment! Take one step at a time, set simple boundaries and don’t extend the limits to a level which you cannot achieve in your over-enthusiasm.
Prioritizing and Choosing:
It's about deciding what's most important to you and allocating your resources accordingly. This could mean saying no to commitments that don't align with your goals or values, or prioritizing tasks that contribute to your overall vision. It is often observed in our fast paced life that due to lack of time to think and/or in a hurry to take a call or make a decision we disregard the importance of prioritizing and choosing your goals. Learn to say “No” when needed, and at the same time stay firm on your own stances, and be diligent in working hard towards them and achieving your goals.
Taking a Stand for Your Values:
Drawing a line is a way of living in accordance with your values. It's about making conscious choices that reflect what you believe in and what you want to create in your life. This is the most critical and important factor not only in your daily life but in every aspect of life or work. Your integrity is of utmost important and should stand foremost in your priorities. Never compromise on your values at any cost. Don’t allow any distractions or external pressures to make you change your decisions; which may cause you embarrassment and disappointment in your life!
Being Intentional:
It's not about reacting defensively to external pressures, but rather about proactively defining your own standards and priorities. Leave no space for “Chance” to take over any factor or aspect of your life. Your life is your responsibility and your integrity and actions should be framed with a steady purpose and intention or design. You cannot take “Chances” with your life!
What are the Benefits of learning to draw the lines in your life?
By drawing lines, you create space for what truly matters, reduce stress, and increase your overall sense of control and fulfillment. There should not be ambiguity about your thought process, your priorities, your choices and your plans in life. Be firm, assertive and confident!
In essence, drawing the line in your life is about:
Self-awareness: Understanding your own needs, values, and limits.
Self-respect: Making choices that honor your well-being and goals.
Self-empowerment: Taking control of your life by setting boundaries and prioritizing what matters most.
Some of the examples that we often come across when people do not draw the lines are penned down here only as a matter of reference and not as hardline theories.
We often come across people, friends, family who feel that at some point in their life you will realize that you have done too much for someone, that the only next possible step to do is to stop. Leave them alone. Walk away. It's not like you're giving up, and it's not like you shouldn't try. But then there is a better solution or in case sadly you have landed yourself in that situation. It's just that you have to draw the line of determination from desperation. What is truly yours will eventually be yours, and what is not, no matter how hard you try, will never be.
So the simple but basic lesson we should learn is rather than fall into a situation that you cannot control; it is better to define your actions in life in a way that you avoid these disappointing situations by drawing the line well before your thoughts convert into actions.
I drew great inspiration from a few lines from Moses Kuria quotes; and I am sure you too will be able to take a leaf out of those inspiring and invaluable lines from his writings:
“When Life feels heavy” At some point in life, everything around you might stop making sense. The Job you once prayed for no longer excites you. The home you used to find comfort in starts to feel heavy. You'll feel disconnected from your purpose, unsure about your business, distant from your family, tired of trying to hold it all together. It'll feel like everything is breaking at the same time. And in that weight, you'll feel this aching need to fit yourself, to fix your life, to go back to the starting point and question if you even chose the right direction. Maybe you're already there. Maybe you're standing in the middle of the chaos right now, watching your relationships shake, your finances shrink, your health shift, and wondering if any of it still makes sense.
If that's where you are, I want you to pause. Just for a second, and remember how far you've already come.
You've carried yourself through more than you give yourself credit for. You’ve survived days you thought would break you. You'll be ok. As always.”
Above all!
Don’t let anyone invalidate or minimize how you feel:
Don't let anyone invalidate or minimize how you feel. If you feel something, you feel it and it's real to you. Nothing anyone says has the power to invalidate that, ever.
No one else lives in your body. No one else sees life through your eyes. No one else has lived through your experiences.
And so no one else has the right to dictate or judge how you feel. Your feelings are important and you deserve to be heard and accepted for who YOU are.
They are inherently valid and they don't matter. Don't let anyone make you believe otherwise.
You should hold your priorities, your choices, and the quality of your life of your life at the helm of all affairs in your life, and there should be no compromise at all as far as your life is concerned.
I can only hope that my thoughts will help you in defining and achieving that happiness in your life, and my best wishes and blessings are always with you all!
I will conclude with two Quotes which always inspire me to keep learning and stand strong, I hope will inspire you too!
"You will face many defeats in life, but never let yourself be defeated." – Maya Angelou, "And Still I Rise"
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on." – Robert Frost.
Cheers to a Better and fulfilled Life!
